Here’s what I’m talking about today…
- Why most self-development practices don’t work
- Powerful mindset hacks to manifest your desires
- Leading from your genius to create inner confidence
- Letting go of what other people think and owning your natural talents
If you want to thrive in your business, you have to cultivate a girl boss mindset.
You’ve probably tried all the techniques to shift your thoughts and hopefully manifest your dreams right?
I’ve tried it all. I’ve done everything from writing down affirmations and saying them in front of a mirror every morning and creating notes to remind myself of how much money I have.
While some of these practices supported me at the early stages of my self-development journey, they felt to basic to keep up with.
It wasn’t until I delved deeper into the unconscious mind, when I found the most powerful mindset hacks.
After a few months of delving more into self-development, I started to learn why I was holding myself back. I discovered that manipulating my thoughts and feelings wern’t going to help me to manifest my goals.
It was my focus that would determine whether I’d manifest my desires. I learn’t about my ego and how my deep-seated beliefs were stopping me from expanding in abundance and success. I discovered that my ego was a separate entity from me and that the only way I’d be able to uplevel in my business would be to stop listening to my ego and follow my genius.
It wasn’t until I started leading from my genius when my business started to flourish. I connected to my natural gifts – my intuition, empathy and burning desire to empower women. When I started owning my talents, I created momentum.
I was in a workshop when I learn’t about my ego and my zone of genius and a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders.
My energy had shifted. I felt lighter and I found inner confidence. I started to trust the journey of growing a business and it was then when opportunities were coming my way.
I was anxious about growing to a new level and I could feel the tension ever increasing. I felt afraid about being, doing, having and creating more. That’s when I discovered 5 powerful mindset practices that have changed my world.
Carl Jung said “until you make the unconscious conscious it will rule your life and you will call it fate”.
In the self-development space there is an obsession with manipulating how we think and feel about ourselves. We say affirmations to ourselves in the mirror such as “I am rich”, “I am prosperous” when in reality we arne’t. Instead of attracting more money and success we’re focusing on what we don’t have – money and success. What happens is we’re reinforcing a discrepancy with what we don’t have, creating frustration and disappointment.
This mindset practice is based on the premise that by controlling our thoughts, we can control our mind and get what we want. The problem with this approach is that we have 8,000 thoughts a day making this an ever impossible task.
The truth is is that our minds are more complicated than that and we have to dig deeper into our unconscious mind to uncover the fixed beliefs that are recreating negative circumstances in our lives.
Our thoughts and assumptions were created at the early stages of our lives and became fixed in our unconscious mind.
Even if we attempt to control our thoughts and feelings, ultimately we’ll follow the path of least resistance.
The path of least resistance is when we unconsciously take destructive steps to sabotage ourselves and recreate negative circumstances in our lives.
When we experience tension in our lives such as moving to a new city, few clients in our business, we’ll resolve the tension by following the path of least resistance. This path of least resistance tends to be taking steps towards what feels more familiar, such as pain and suffering.
This often shows up as getting burnt out in our business and fueling relationship conflict by antagonizing our partner.
The good news is that with self-awareness we have the power to stop self-sabotage in its tracks. Once we’re aware of the patterns of thoughts, feelings and beliefs when we’re triggered, we can choose to respond differently. Instead of reacting and torturing ourselves we can pivot our focus.
If you havn’t read my article on self-sabotage – you’ll discover a hack that you can use when you experience tension.
When we’re aware that we’re acting like a child such as blaming others, not taking responsibility or having tantrums we know that we’re coming from a place of fear and ego.
This gives us an opportunity to shift our focus and think about what end result we want in that situation.
For example, if our end result is creating an intentional and manageable business but we’re experiencing stress, our next step might be going to an exercise class. This is a functional way of dealing with tension as exercise will act as a buffer against stress and burnout.
Stressful situations in our business or conflicts in our relationships are playgrounds for us to grow and evolve.
These consist of tension that we have to learn to manage with intention. If we’re experiencing resistance or tension we can have structures and habits in place that resolve the tension in a healthy way.
So if you want a girl boss mindset, you have to start managing tension with intention. This can be meditating every day, exercising, journaling to relieve emotional stress and morning habits to feel strengthened and grounded.
Knowing who we are, what we want and what we need to do to get it gives us direction.
When we have crystal clarity on our values, vision and end results we have inflated levels of self-esteem.
We feel more positive about ourselves when we know who we are and the person that we want to become in the future.
If you’re a girl boss and you haven’t got a vision for what you want to create it’s important that you create one.
Having a vision for your long-term aspirations will give you an anchor for what you want to be, do, have and create.
This habit of being future-focused will help you to look beyond your current circumstances, cultivating focus and energy.
Once you know your girl boss vision, next you have to get clear on the skills that you need to get there.
It might be that you want to scale your business and create group coaching programs.
If this is the case, you’ll need to identify the steps you need to take to make that happen. Here you can start from the end result and reverse engineer it. If your end result is enrolling 10 people on a group program, you may work out that you need 60 people attending a webinar, 168 people registering to a webinar and investing $400 in Facebook advertising to get those leads.
Starting from your end result and reverse engineering it will give you clarity on what you need to do.
As well as having a vision, every girlboss has self-integrity. Instead of dreaming about their desires and rubbing crystals together, they take action and stick to it.
They have self-discipline because they know that there’s a relationship between what they say they’ll do and their self-worth.
They know that if they set goals and don’t take action, they’ll feel guilty and lose belief in themselves.
They’ve learn’t that their actions are a reflection of their self-belief so they become action-oriented. This reinforces their self-discipline, their “can do” attitude and girlboss mindset.
Every girl boss knows that every failure is a stepping stone towards their success and that every no takes them closer to a yes.
Instead of believing their inner voice that they’re a “failure” or they’re not “good enough”, they get on with it and focus on their end result. Every girlboss trusts the journey and sticks to their word.
Let go of what people think
When we’ve had a history of dysfunctional parent/child relationships, we’re left with a lot of unresolved feelings.
This manifests into attracting unhealthy and codependent relationships that continue the drama and conflict.
Seeking approval, acknowledgement from others is unfortunately a manifestation of that.
If we didn’t get the compassion, love, approval, acceptance and understanding early on in our lives we’ll seek that in relationships.
This holds us back from expanding in love, joy and success because we’re worried about being judged.
We can’t move forward if we’re holding onto the past so we have to let go from seeking approval from others. We have to approve ourselves and find love within.
We have to stop feeling worried about what other people think about us. Instead of asking about what other people think, we have to follow our inner guidance and learn from our mistakes. If we mess up that’s ok, we’ll know ourselves more and trust our judgments the next time a similar situation crops up.
Good girl to girlboss
You no longer have to be a ‘good girl’. The girl who says yes to everything. The girl who values others’ opinions before her own.
Accept the fact that not everyone is going to like you or agree with you. You are enough and you have everything within you to create what you want.
It’s time to break away from approval seeking and lead from your zone of genius. When you lead with your genius you’ll find inner confidence and forget about what other people think.
You know more than you think and it’s time you start owning your natural talents.
Here’s to your journey of unstoppable success.
With so much gratitude and appreciation,